Late Memo: When a 43 Year Old Man Drugs and Rapes a 13 Year Old Girl, That’s Called ‘Rape-Rape’
In March of 1977, Roman Polanski, who was 43 at the time, invited a 13 year old girl to pose for pictures in a magazine he was guest-editing. He gave this 13 year old girl champagne and a Quaalude. He knew that she was 13 years old and even called her mother to tell her that they were running late. The man knew very well what he was doing and apparently “running late” means ‘Hey, I gave your 13 year old daughter a roofie cocktail and once I am done violating her in any and every way I can and get what I want, I’ll return her to you.’
Trigger Warning! The following contents of the post may be triggering to some. Please read with caution.
According to the 13 year old girl’s grand jury testimony, Mr. Polanski proceeded to instruct the girl to get into a jacuzzi naked, refused to take her home when she begged him to leave, he began kissing her, even though she said no and told him to stop. He then proceeded to perform oral sex on her and then vaginally and anally raped her. All the while, she was telling him no and telling him to stop. For the record, this is an unlawful, non-consensual and prosecutable violation of a child. This is rape. ‘Rape-rape,’ if you will, Whoopi Goldberg.
End of Trigger Warning
Since news broke of Roman Polanski’s arrest, many people have come out to defend Polanski; saying that he is an old man now who has lead a rough life and who had a 13 year old girl thrust upon him by her mother, and therefore, he isn’t to blame for what he did. As Kate Harding reported, Joan Z. Shore of the Huffington Post thinks that because she had once met Roman Polanski and was “charmed by [his] sobriety and intelligence,” that obviously puts him above the law; in fact, she claims that he is the victim of this situation. She wrote, “The 13 year old model ’seduced’ by Polanski had been thrust onto him by her mother, who wanted her in the movies. The girl was just a few weeks short of her 14th birthday, which was the age of consent in California. (It’s probably 13 by now!) Polanski was demonized by the press, convicted, and managed to flee, fearing a heavy sentence.”
There are many mind-blowing, ‘I can’t believe I just read that’ parts of that small paragraph. So let’s start.
The age of consent in California at the time was 16; not 14, but 16. And it is also worth mentioning that Polanski’s victim was 13 and even if the legal age of consent in California was 14 at the time, which it wasn’t, a few weeks means nothing from a legal standpoint; almost does not count. The legal age of consent currently in California is 18, for anyone wondering. Also, according to grand jury testimony, the girl’s mother did not “thrust” the girl onto Polanski, since testimony says that the mother was unaware of the photo shoot to begin with. As Jeff Fecke points out, regardless of the mother’s actions at that time, no parent can consent to their under-aged child having sex; which is why parents who “sell” their children to their rapists are subject to prosecution, we don’t see the parents in court and their lawyers defending them by saying “But her/his mother/father gave him permission to be raped by that person,” because that’s ludicrous.
Polanski being “demonized” by the press is also laughable. Polanski pled guilty to unlawful sexual conduct with a minor, a deal was struck in the courts so he did not plead guilty to his actual crime–drugging and raping a child. First of all, money and fame had already put him way above the law and because he fled, that makes him a fugitive and all back-door court deals, as far as I’m concerned, go right out the window. I also love the wordage “managed to flee.” Would we still find this word usage acceptable in any other child rape case? Would we find Roman Polanski’s actions acceptable if this was any other person, or any other crime, for that matter? Again, no. What this comes down to is the fact that Roman Polanski is a wealthy, well-known and somehow respected man and the fact that he had drugged and raped a child has not been the focus of much of the media coverage that has been circulating about him; the media has done their part in protecting a pedophile and a great deal of people have sided with that coverage. So let’s just all say it together and let it sink in–Fame, money and power should never put someone above the law and the fact that Roman Polanski is a pedophile, a rapist and a fugitive, makes him subject to even harsher sentencing than he would have encountered when these charges had first been filed.
Sure, we can continue to use the absolutely astonishing and grotesque buffer that Roman Polanski has had a rough life, but then we would also have to give the same leniency to other people who have been forced to overcome tragedy in their lives. Would we be willing to release any and all criminals currently serving time in prison for crimes they have committed if their childhood or young adult lives were tough? No, because no one cares about criminals currently serving time in prison because they don’t have bottomless pockets and they are not directing movies that people happen to like. While it’s true that Polanski is a survivor of the Holocaust and lost family members and it’s true that his first wife and unborn child were murdered by the Manson Family, but Mr. Polanski also has quite the collection of achievements, including being able to work as a director, owning multiple homes in Europe, getting married and being the father of two children (which I’ll also be the first to say he should not have been able to father children, being a convicted child rapist and all,) and Polanski even won an Oscar. The only privilege Polanski did not have access to is being able to enter the United States. Yeah, poor him.
There are several filmmakers who are demanding, yes demanding Polanski’s release. A petition has even been making the rounds to Hollywood heavy hitters. The petition is backed by France’s Societe des Auteurs et Compositeurs Dramatiques (Society of Dramatic Authors and Composers) and currently has about 138 signatures, including Woody Allen (surprise, surprise,) Pedro Almodovar, Martin Scorsese, Monica Bellucci, Tilda Swinton, David Lynch, Jonathan Demme, John Landis, and many, many others. Harvey Weinstein is also currently trying to recruit more supporters for Polanski. To all of these people attempting to use their power to convince others that a man with a tremendous amount of power on his own should be exempt from the law I have to ask, ‘What are you on?’ This is complete and utter bullshit and it’s interesting to know what proud, petition-signing, rape apologists we have in Hollywood who are so willing to attempt to protect a child rapist.
Where’s a Convicted Sex Offender to Go?
Last Thursday the American Civil Liberties Union filed a lawsuit to strike down laws in Miami-Dade County, Florida, that restrict convicted sex offenders from living within 2,500 feet of where children gather. The problem with the law? Well, in the eyes of the American Civil Liberties Union, convicted sex offenders are living with too much restriction when it comes to where they can habitat and because these sex offenders are not able to find housing far enough away from where children gather, more and more have been living under a bridge.
The Julia Tuttle Causeway, which connects Miami to Miami Beach, has become home to at least 70 convicted sex offenders over the last three years. Law enforcement officials have said that ‘Tuttle’ is a public-safety hazard and while the 2,500-foot-law is intended to keep the public safe, some are contesting that the public includes these convicted sex offenders and that the law should be more relaxed, giving these people more leeway to be able to find a suitable home.
State and county officials have been pushing for changing one or more laws in order for these people to move into more permanent homes, but have seen politicians in the state shirking responsibility. Gov. Charlie Crist has placed responsibility for this case on local governments, saying that they have “the right to do what they feel is appropriate for the citizens that they serve.” The county commissioner, Jose Diaz, defended the county law by saying, “If I can save some kids from going through this agony, I’ve done my job.”
The fact that there is a lawsuit aiming to change “one or more laws” in order for convicted sex offenders to move into areas that they were otherwise not be permitted under any circumstances is horrifying. This entire case shows a level of laziness among state officials that is incomprehensible. On a humanist level it is not okay for people to be forced to live under a bridge, regardless of the record they hold. I firmly believe that every single human should have a roof over their head, a bed to sleep in, and food to sustain them; however, the safety of the people in which certain laws were created to protect should never, not for a second, be jeopardized and relaxing laws to allow convicted sex offenders to move closer to areas where children gather would most definitely be jeopardizing that security and safety.
This is a tragic case of laziness within the public service sector of Florida. Homelessness is a huge problem in the United States and given the fact that we are in the midst of a global recession, the number of people left homeless in this country will only logically rise. We need states to step up and either sustain the homeless shelters, spaces, and services already readily available or create these spaces in their communities so the people of their areas are not being forced to live under a bridge or in recently widely-known tent cities that are continuing to sprout up around the country. This mindset is also very much needed for convicted felons. As a survivor of childhood trauma and abuse, including sexual assault, I will be one of the first people to speak up for harsher prison sentences for those found guilty of these types of crimes and I will also be one of the first people to tell you that I don’t believe rehabilitation for convicted sex offenders is possible, which is precisely why states must ensure that they are equipped with the necessary resources and facilities in which these people can reside without infringing upon the safety of the people in the areas in which they live.
A Rock Shock to the Status Quo
The Chicago Alliance Against Sexual Exploitation, PAVE, and The Voices and Faces Project have all teamed up to host a rock concert to benefit the great organizations working to end sexual assault.
A Rock Shock to the Status Quo will feature Martha Berner, The Laureates, and Tyler Jon Tyler.
When: April 26th, 7:00pm.
Where: Schubas, located at 3159 N. Southport , Chicago, IL.
The event is only $10 so if you’re in the Chicago area, please consider attending this event and helping the countless survivors of sexual assault who need the organizations who work to help them and end sexual violence.
RAINN’s Technology Access Project: Offering Free Website & Email Services to Affiliates
Most of us have relied on the internet for valid, educational information. A lot of us have relied on the friends and support systems we have cultivated online to help sort out our feelings, opinions, and problems in our day to day lives. We undoubtedly live in a society where a great amount of people have become reliant on technology but there are still needs to be met when it comes to the information and support many of us need via the internet world, especially those of us who have survived or are still surviving abuse and trauma. RAINN is the nation’s largest anti-sexual assault organization that has aided so many survivors in need of support and advocates of survivors in need of information. RAINN has not only helped people through their 1-800 hotline, but because they understand the reliance we have on technology and the fact that more survivors are willing to open up via the internet, where they can remain completely anonymous, they opened up a 24/7 online hotline.
In an effort to bring more technology-based support to survivors, they are ensuring that all of their affiliates across the country have the ability to have a web presence of their own for the survivors in need in their areas. Because the vast amount of companies, organizations, and people who use the internet do not have the knowledge necessary to create a clean, functional, and user-friendly web presence of their own, RAINN has started the Technology Access Project that will offer all of RAINN’s participating affiliates a free website and free email services to help aid and support their base of survivors, as well as to educate those in their areas about abuse and trauma, and also how to heal, starting in Spring of 2009. The Technology Access Project is made possible by Grant no. 2008-TA-AX-K012, awarded to RAINN by the Office on Violence Against Women, U.S. Department of Justice.
This is a monumental step forward for survivors in need of RAINN and their affiliate’s support and services. Because they are offering websites and email services for free, they are ensuring that every single participating affiliate of theirs has the ability to create a web presence without any financial burden or even technical experience. RAINN’s technical staff will be available for any affiliate who is lacking in technical experience to walk them through the brief setup process and they will also be available to answer technical questions for as long as they are using the service. Best of all, your domain name will not be owned by RAINN; ownership will be retained by the affiliate even if they decide to stop using RAINN’s service.
I am thrilled that RAINN has decided to do this and that the Office on Violence Against Women saw a need for technological support and filled it, making RAINN’s Technology Access Project possible.
The Army of Angels Conference: Moving from Survivor to Warrior
It is very different to have survived abuse and trauma and to truly be a survivor. However, being a survivor, as it turns out, is simply is the tip of the iceberg. Angela Shelton, the woman who made the award-winning documentary Searching for Angela Shelton and wrote the book Finding Angela Shelton has become an expert in trauma and recovery and it’s really no surprise how she did it; she survived her own abuse and as she got older (and wiser) she dealt with her past and looked onward to her future. She has become an icon for many survivors out there in need of becoming the warrior they can be in their lives. Speaking of becoming a warrior, Angela has an exciting event coming up soon–Very soon, in fact.
The The Angela Shelton Foundation and PAVE are holding the first annual Army of Angels Conference in Las Vegas, Nevada on March 13 and 14.
The Army of Angels is a group of people who have been inspired and helped by Angela Shelton’s work and have transformed their lives. They are now working to inspire healing, awareness, and joy in their own lives as well as the lives of others. There will be many speakers at the conference, including Angela Shelton herself who will also be doing her ‘Removing the Sword of Trauma’ powerpoint presentation.
If you are interested in attending the Army of Angels inaugural conference, check out the event on Eventbrite and contact diann@angelashelton.com for more information.
Celebrate 8 Years with PAVE
On February 15, PAVE (Promoting Awareness, Victim Empowerment) is celebrating its eight year anniversary with a Love Fest!
The event will be held from 4pm to 8pm at Martyrs, located at 3855 N Lincoln Ave in Chicago, IL. Festivities include complimentary hair styles by Lather Chicago, music by Anne Harris, a burlesque show with Red Hot Annie, a variety show with Nikki Patin, local celebrities like April Rose who is a model and TV host, a raffle including W Hotel getaway, Bulls tickets and many other prizes and a variety of surprises throughout the evening.
If you’re in or will be in the Chicago area on February 15, you should really check out this event and help PAVE go on to do even more amazing work for survivors of sexual violence and shattering the silence around it. You can purchase your tickets at Paving the Way, $20 presale or $25 at the door. Also be sure to check out their Facebook page to see who else will be there and learn more about PAVE.
RAINN’s Online Hotline is Now 24/7
RAINN has been running the internet’s first live, secure hotline service for victims and survivors of rape, abuse and incest for a few months for 5 hours a day, 5 days a week. During those months, RAINN has helped more than 22,000 people with the help of over 450 volunteers nationwide.
Because more and more people are seeking help on the internet, RAINN’s online hotline has been crucial to survivors and due to the demand of their service, RAINN has extended their operation hours and are now up and running 24 hours a day, 7 days a week.
As a survivor I have found that while finding help when you need it online is scarce, but when you do find it, there is an overwhelming release that comes with it. For me and I would think some other survivors out there, words come easier for me when I am typing; words tend to fail me if I’m on the phone and especially when I’m face to face with a therapist or counselor, so for RAINN to have a reliable and secure live, online service with trained professionals on the other end of the website is amazing.
If you are a survivor, get immediate support in a safe and secure online environment at the RAINN online hotline now open 24/7!
13 Year Old Rape Victim Stoned to Death in Somalia
A thirteen year old girl, identified by Amnesty International as Aisha Ibrahim Duhulow was raped by three men while she, on foot, was on her way to visit her grandmother in the war-torn capital of Mogadishu. When she and her parents sought help and justice from the authorities, Duhulow was victimized yet again.
The first reports of this story claimed that Duhulow was not a young girl, but a 23 year old young woman who had confessed to adultery and thus, under Shariah, the legal code of Islam based on the Koran, was sentenced to death by stoning where the young girl was forced into a hole, buried up to her neck and pelted with stones by 50 men in front of a crowd of about 1,000 on-lookers.
This story most certainly does not add up; a child was raped and instead of administering justice, the government made up a warped and untrue story and aged the girl ten years to get away with their conviction because convicting a 13 year old girl for adultery is illegal under Islamic law, while the three men who raped this girl have yet to be arrested.
A human rights activist in the town told BBC that he had received death threats from the Islamic militia for spreading the truth about this incident, accusing him of spreading false information.
Listen to Kate Allen, director of Amnesty International, discuss the stoning and the story behind this young girl here.
Rally of the Buzzwords
From here on in, expect any smear campaign that McCain launches towards Obama to be taken at face value, but instead of those of us who are sane, practical and logical, we know to do our homework on any candidate, no matter who they are, and make an informed decision based on what that candidate can do for this country and for us. However, like many of us are all too aware of, there are some people out there who instead of doing their research on a candidate or thinking for more than 1.3 seconds about the legitimacy of what kind of bullshit “their” candidate is putting out into the media, there are way too many people who will soak up McCain’s bogus ads, go to see him speak and then throw nothing but buzzwords out, believing wholeheartedly that the bullshit their brains soaked up like a sponge from the oh so “reliable” sources like Rush Limbaugh, Bill O’Reilly, Fox News and John McCain and Sarah Palin themselves are completely right, not giving any of these accusations a second thought and accepting them as truth.
So for those who believe that the video in the last post was a fluke or that “not all” McCain supporters think or act like those who made asses of themselves in that video, here is another from Bethlehem, Pennsylvania. I am ashamed to share a state with these people.
A big thanks goes out to all of the aforementioned sane, practical and logical folks who were also at that rally trying to spread the truth about McCain/Palin such as the fact that Palin made women in Alaska pay for their own rape kits. The replies of their supporters? Well, they believe that a woman who is raped should pay for their own rape kit and not only that, but they should pay double, die, or be killed.
Nice, huh?
This election is ugly, yes, but a woman is never at fault for being raped and the people who believe that a woman is at fault are the same people who believe that she was asking for it, deserved it, should be killed because of it or they are the people who believe rape doesn’t exist, don’t teach their children about sexual assault at a young age, or maybe they are also the people who are abusers themselves.
While it is obvious that the McCain camp is “turning a page” and doing very little but launching attacks on Obama, what the fuck ever happened to humanity? As a feminist, activist, and advocate for rape and sexual assault, myself and many other people out there are speaking out about abuse and trauma and if you ever thought “Hey, this is about human decency, who doesn’t care about something that should come naturally to being a human?” These are obviously the people we are up against.
If there is one issue that is screaming at the top of its lungs that we need to reform, it’s education. There are so many people in this country who need to be educated and you just saw a video of several.
Hounddog
I just finished watching the movie Hounddog; I received it over a week ago but because I’ve been working a lot lately, it took me a little while to get the time (and emotional energy) to sit down and watch it. On that note, waiting over a week to watch it was a big mistake because this movie is phenomenal.
Hounddog is about healing–From having to grow up way too early, from sexual assault and from betrayal; it shows life in its sometimes unpleasant and ugly, but also inspiring glory. Dakota Fanning plays a young girl in the American south who lives in a world where so much is expected from her and so much tries to destroy her; from a family who feels as if she is to grow up and even as a young child, expects her to be a woman of the house, to a sexual assault. Hounddog shows you the aftermath of sexual assault, how one can become so sick because of it, but it also shows you hope and a girl who is determined to save herself with the help of a friend.
Hounddog has had a very bumpy road thus far, from Sundance where it was criticized and deemed the ‘Dakota Fanning Rape Movie’ to online reviews that I read after watching it that tear it apart. As a survivor, I loved Hounddog and the only criticism I do have is that I wish it were longer and had a more solidified ending. I loved the hope that it gives to people watching it and most of all, a particular monologue in the movie was so powerful that one moment I was laying on my couch, taking the movie in and the next was sobbing because the words that were spoken were so dead on and were so profound that it really made the entire movie. Those words were exactly what I and what so many other survivors needed to hear and it is because of everything that is said in that one, short monologue that really sums up why no survivor can let their abuser destroy or take their spirit from them.
Every survivor of sexual assault should see this movie. It will stay with you and it will give you that gentle push that so many of us often need to speak up and break the silence surrounding sexual assault. Hounddog is a movie that exudes hope and infuses survivors with a resonating voice that says ‘I understand, it isn’t your fault, now take back what is yours.’
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Out Campaign
The OUT Campaign allows individuals to let others know they are not alone. It can also be a nice way of opening a conversation and help to demolish the negative stereotypes of atheists. Let the world know that we are not about to go away and that we are not going to allow those that would condemn us to push us into the shadows.
