January 20, 2008

We meet a variety of different people online. With the recent hype of social networking websites like MySpace and Facebook, we certainly have the pipelines and capability to connect with thousands, perhaps even millions of different people from all around the world. The problem with the internet, in many cases, is that the people you connect with so closely online start to become real to you. While yes, they are real people, the question most often asked when it comes to “online friends” is do you really know them?

In many cases, if you’ve been communicating with someone long enough on the internet, you start to refer to them as your closest friends, the people you can go to when you just need to get things happening in your life off your chest; sometimes they even become your safe haven. In the same sense, these people become as important to you as the people you see on a regular basis, go shopping with, and other friend-like activities; and on that note, it’s as confusing when someone you’ve spoken to online for years springs the friend breakup on you.

Lines that would most resemble cliche breakup lines are all of a sudden sprung on you. Lines such as “It’s not you, it’s me,” or in many cases because of people who refuse to let go of personal pride and what is most often true in a traditional relationship breakup, “It’s not me, it’s you.” And for what, really? Because you couldn’t instant message them as often as you would have liked? Because that person feels as if you don’t have much in common anymore because you may focus on your personal life, career, family, or your need to pay the bills more often than you may be able to sign onto AIM?

But I suppose that is the difference between the “online friends” you acquire in your time on the internet and the ones who you see on a regular basis or have been your friends for quite a long time. The first feel as if you don’t have much to talk about anymore and in turn, stop all contact and feed you overdone lines while the latter grow with you, understand you, go through life with you.

This really raises the question–Do we grow apart from our friends or do we simply grow while we know our friends are always going to be there for us? My guess is that while it should be the latter, it not always is and that is unfortunate.

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8 Responses »

1. neil strauss on January 21st, 2008 at 5:54 pm

   The friends I have online are the friends I already know. Like facebook. I have been using it to keep in contact with the friends I already know rather than get new ones. If I do make a friend online, I would only consider her/him a friend after I have met them in real life.

2. Atlanta New Homes on January 23rd, 2008 at 2:38 pm

   I agree with Neil. When I’m connecting on social networks such as facebook and myspace, the “friends” that I have on there, for me are my actual friends. It is a rare occasion that I will accept a friend request from someone that I don’t know or haven’t met. I think it’s kind of weird when people build their social networks on people they just know over an online portal. If this is the case, people need to understand that the internet may seem like a reality but it isn’t. Personal connective relationships are with people that you have actually met or know. People’s personalities are easily changed and different when typing or online. You don’t actually get to know someone I don’t believe until you meet them.

3. st valentines day gift baskets on January 25th, 2008 at 7:25 pm

   I agree that with these social media I have friends at places where i would never ever have thought that I will have friends . Web 2.0 is definitely a great way to visit places where normally you would never ever go and also know the world thorugh their eyes

4. miss wheelchair on February 15th, 2008 at 4:45 pm

   I absolutely love that I can communicate with old friends and classmates through Facebook and the other social sites. The other people on these sites however, I’m wary about simply because you never know who they really could be. But I am a friendly person and usually don’t turn anyone away for a friendship - even if it’s only an ‘online’ friendship.

5. Technology Transfer Services on March 10th, 2008 at 7:23 am

   This article highlights the dangers of addiction to a virtual life environment provided by certain web communities. These communities have benefits but also some other problems that social psychologists study and research but with no real outcomes as the number of variables is too high to produce a certain result.

6. online loan on March 22nd, 2008 at 11:17 am

   I must say that my life-long friends have turned their back on me on many occasions and this is why I prefer the IM friends. If they’re online it means they are there for you. I have many internet friends that are always open for discussions and they’ve always gave me great advice.

7. home based business on March 25th, 2008 at 9:08 am

   helps a lot
   nice idea this is
   you always need to talk to someone in these kinda cases

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