Purity and Integrity…Balls
I’ve spoken quite a bit on purity balls before, but lets face it, this topic in all of its Nazi-religious and abstinence-only brainwashing glory never gets old. Not to mention, of course, the underlying points of these affairs and how they tend to scream “incest” in not only big, but also bold and red type.
Abstinence-only sex education programs have been swarming the nation not only recently, but have been consistently supported by the federal government since the 1981 Reagan Administration. The federal government has been condoning this ludicrous education program and pouring more than $1.677 billion into it since 1996.
Refusing to accept that abstinence-only education does not work, the religious right had been holding formal events depicting what a traditional wedding would look like for young girls and their fathers. The Father-Daughter Purity Ball, sponsored by the Colorado Springs Generations of Light Ministries, are basically young girls pledging to their fathers that they will remain pure and virginal until the day (or night) they marry.
Making a commitment to yourself to remain a virgin until your wedding day is one thing that I could completely understand. A woman making an informed and personal decision for herself is admirable, especially if that woman is of the mature age to know what she is talking about and making that decision for herself and no one else. However, these balls are not only being targeted towards teenage girls and their creepy fathers, but also to girls that look so young that they were more than likely told “Honey, look at the big, fancy dress you get to wear and there is going to be a lot of cake there!” Hell, if I were 5 years old, I’d be all about going too! And at that young of an age, the aforementioned creepy fathers only seem even creepier. I mean, it isn’t every day you look at your daughter, who is still dreaming about growing up so she can eat 3 bowls of ice cream for dinner and can’t even tie her shoes yet and immediately think about her virginity. Not only that, but to the point where you’re buying a matching cummerbund and taking her to a dance where you then imitate something that also looks like it came right out of a standard, traditional wedding. Right?
The pledge read by the father at a purity ball reads:
I, [daughter's name]‘s father, choose before God to cover my daughter as her authority and protection in the area of purity. I will be pure in my own life as a man, husband and father. I will be a man of integrity and accountability as I lead, guide and pray over my daughter and as the high priest in my home. This covering will be used by God to influence generations to come.
High priest!? It kind of makes you think that while writing this script they were joking saying “I can’t wait to see how many websites jump on this!” But sadly, they are completely serious. Maybe I can try that on the boyfriend while in bed–”Oh high priest…” It certainly appeals to many male egos.
What these events are basically saying is ‘If you really love your father, you will dress up, do an interpretive dance, read words off of a script that is provided for you, so you don’t even have to go through the task of coming up with your own words that describe how you, as a person, feel, and make a commitment you are not yet old enough to understand.’ Most of the girls from the pictures on the website look like hardcore Sesame Street fans and I think that most of them even needed a little help with the big words in their script. And one of the biggest things that I have against these affairs, not including that I think Megan’s Law should keep a close eye on any father bringing his daughter to one of these, is that they are teaching young girls that they should be giving themselves as a wedding present to their husbands on their wedding day. This is saying that we need to backtrack over a few decades to where a woman is only valuable to a man if she is a virgin, making her value as a human being only determined by her sexuality, Or if dad and God have anything to do with it, lack thereof.
The first time I spoke about purity balls I received a few emails and comments turning the tables on the father-daughter event and asking what would one think of when they heard mother-son. Well now we can question no further!
I introduce to you…The Integrity Ball!
Notice that purity was replaced with integrity–Because a man with integrity chooses a virgin to marry! I love how they go hand in hand. The integrity ball also goes on to tell young men more about women and about how they need to be “pure”, by making them think of their mothers. Ew?
Who else thinks these things came about when parents started feeling uncomfortable talking to their children about sex? Now we can just escort our children to balls, make young girls have pseudo-weddings with their fathers on their arm and make young men think about their mothers in a sexual manner.
Bad fetish porn, anyone?