Slut Shaming From Sextexting Leads To Suicide

Sorted under harassment, sexism on March 10, 2009

sextexting Her name was Jesse Logan and she is dead.  This young woman hanged herself after repeated verbal abuse from her classmates regarding nude photos of herself that she sent to a former boyfriend.

Walking down the hallways she reported being called a slut, whore and having things thrown at her.  Imagine having to face that kind of treatment everyday just to get an education.

Before she committed suicide she had an interview with the media where she detailed the horrible treatment that she was receiving.  Just two weeks after taking her story public she was dead.

Much of the reports on her death have focused on the issue of sextexting i.e sending sexually explicit images over the internet.  Law makers are concerned that this is a form of child pornography.  The real issue should be what happens to these images once they are released and how they are interpreted by society.

If Jesse had been male, would these kids have thought to use the taunt of  slut and whore? These words are specifically targeted at women to make them feel shame for daring to be sexual.  We live in a society where female bodies are often sexualized for the benefit of the male gaze and yet if a woman chooses to be an active body and reveal her body for her own gratification she is shamed publicly.  Sex is something that we are told that we may only submit to unwillingly.

Even when we apply the words slut to men we routinely ad the word male in front of it to denote a change in referring gender i.e. male slut, male whore.  Instead of dealing with this as an issue of restricting pornography, we should be concerning ourselves with the warped message that the young are receiving as it relates to gender and sexuality.

We are sexual creatures and the fact that we deny this essential part of our nature is ridiculous.  The same behaviour that we promote and encourage in males, we stigmatize and discipline women for.  A man that has various sexual partner is a stud, a hero of sorts and yet a young woman engaging in the same behaviour is slut shamed.  We claim that we have reached a post feminist time and yet we regularly punish women and attempt to control their behaviour.

The demands of purity are very much a part of how we raise our daughters.  Each day they are inundated with sexualized images of women and are then taught not to engage in sex unless it occurs within the context of a patriarchal marriage. We teach them to leverage their bodies for the brass ring as though marriage will somehow guarantee them a form of security.  For women in particular, gender becomes a performance with few rewards.  The basis of female life is submission to male desires, needs, and wants, and it is this point that needs to be understood by all.  Yes there is a need for feminism.  Young girls need a haven that they can turn to which will teach a positive affirmation of their bodies and their lives.

Sending a nude picture of yourself should not lead to this kind of treatment and schools need to take the issue of harassment seriously.  It is not a simple matter of hurt feelings; for some it is a life and death issue.   Any action that diminishes another should not be allowed on any school property.  They are responsible for creating a hostile free learning environment and by not taking corrective measures all they did was teach Jesse’s assailants that they were right to taunt her in the manner that they did.

When incidents like this happen we need to pay close attention to how they are spoken about.  This is not about sextexting, this is about gender based harassment and slut shaming.  No young woman should be made to feel desperate enough to kill herself because we refuse to believe that women should have the right to display their bodies or be sexual outside of male control.

H/T Shakesville

Cross Posted from Womanist Musings



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  • "Sex is something that we are told that we may only submit to unwillingly." That's exactly the message I was given as a child. What a set up! Good, awareness-raising article. What an avoidable tragedy! Thanks for illuminating.
  • Dee
    I did not hear about this. What a heart rending tale.!

    The boys and girls who persisted in spreading the information in cyberspace were aprt from being terribly mean spirited were also engaging in illegalities. These are kids and unfortunately the point you make hear is lost on teens many of whom will not wise up to these issues until they gain some maturity.

    We live in an age where the information highway is king. The hurdles and dangers are many. My heart goes out to that mother.
  • Alyssa in SF
    What an incredibly tragic event. I completely agree with you. It is very upsetting that the media is not standing up for her, and is instead bashing the action she chose to engage in. Who is going after the bullies and taunters?
  • They so rarely go after the bullies and taunters...
  • This girl made a TERRIBLE mistake. A teenager sending naked pics of herself to a teenaged BOY?

    The tragedy I see here is no parental guidance of any kind. First off, that they had not taught her better judgment than this. Second, that they forced her to endure the consequences to the point that she wanted to die. You can't control the actions of a dozen or more other kids, but you CAN say "enough is enough" and remove your child. I'm sure after a few days she had learned her lesson. Why did the parents leave her in that situation so long?
  • Mark
    [I]No young woman should be made to feel desperate enough to kill herself because we refuse to believe that women should have the right to display their bodies or be sexual outside of male control.[/I}

    HERE HERE!! Kudos for making this an issue to be confronted and one day conquered.
  • Those are very hurtful words to hear, especially for a teenage girl. This is very sad to learn of.
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